It’s my birthday month!!! Let me tell you, I am definitely not ready to turn 17 because it’s the same as being 16. This was terrible but I needed this to learn and grow. Without further ado, I hope you enjoy me venting about my stressful year. 

October 2022

I turned 16 years old, marking the beginning of becoming a young adult. I got sick on my birthday, like I do every year around this week. I got my first tattoo a week after my birthday which was Angel Wings with the word “Mom” in the middle as well as the birth and death date of my mom. This was a big thing for me because I’ve always wanted a tattoo and was finally able to get one. 

November 2022

This was a good month for me because I received my varsity football letter for my letterman jacket. I worked hard to be a varsity manager and was able to achieve this goal of receiving this letter. I knew I wanted to get a job right when I turned 16, so I also applied to Starbucks, which I was blessed enough to be hired for. 

December 2022

It was Christmas season so I was excited because I knew I was able to get my own presents for everyone since I was earning my own money. I was very happy and my mental health was improving a lot, helping me grow as a person. 

January 2023

It was the New Year, where everything started to go downhill. I got my driver’s license and then 4 days later I crashed into my brother’s truck so I was banned from driving for a few weeks. I did something stupid which has affected my reputation, but I learned something valuable about myself. 

February 2023

Nothing really happened this month, but I was striving in academics and at my job. I was really proud of myself because this was a big accomplishment for me. 

March 2023- disclaimer:My personal experience and choices

This month changed me as a person because I decided to change myself. I decided to go off my anxiety medication because I thought I was doing better. This was something that I’ve been wanting to do for a long time but I never brought myself to do it until now. 

April 2023 

My grades started dropping and I stopped trying my best at school. I no longer cared about my education and I became sad. This feeling was something I remembered and never wanted to endure again, but it was happening. I didn’t do anything about it though because I thought I was going to be okay. 

May 2023

I really ended off my sophomore year with not so perfect grades but I didn’t care. I officially stopped caring about the things that should’ve mattered to me. I reconnected with someone from my past which I thought was a good idea at the time. I started going to Church which helped me a lot.  

June 2023

I learned a lot of lessons that changed my life. I started realizing that the lack of medicine was changing me and I needed to do something about it. Around the end of the month I got a boyfriend. 

July 2023

Everything was going great for the first 3 weeks of July. I was happy, in a good relationship, and working. Football was starting up again, so nothing seemed bad. At the end of this month, my boyfriend and I broke up and that’s when my life started changing. I stopped going to Church but I can’t explain why.

August 2023

My ex and I made amends and we became good friends. Best Friends at the most but there was still something missing. Junior year started and football season was here. I was still sad and realized that only I could change how I felt, so I started finding ways to make myself happy. 

September 2023

I became very stressed and confused about the things going on in my life. I wasn’t living for myself, I was living for other people, which isn’t the way to make yourself happy. So, I decided to go to a meeting about admissions at the University of Notre Dame. That is my dream school so I was really excited that I got invited to this meeting. 

October 2023

Well, a lot happened this month leading to October 18th. My car stopped working so I was borrowing cars for two weeks straight. That brought so much stress upon me which led to me quitting my job because I couldn’t handle the stress anymore. Well, I could handle the stress, but I was reaching the point where I couldn’t take it anymore. I bought myself a new phone because it was something I needed and I knew I was old enough to make that purchase. The week of my birthday came around and I decided to get another tattoo because it’s just now a tradition to get birthday tattoos. Then on October 18th, I did nothing for my birthday except lay in my bed all day and then go to dinner. 

My birthday has always been one of my least favorite days out of the 365 days. This year was very different because I didn’t go to school nor did I go out with friends. I’ve realized that everything changes and sometimes you can’t do anything about it, you just have to Let Go and Let God.